4 years. That is how long ago, this October, that I started this little slice of space on the internet. In all that time, I have had really great feedback and comments. That is until yesterday. My wonderful, cute post of my 3-year-old, which was adorable (or so I thought) of him playing with a laptop pretending to “work” like mommy, obviously offended someone. So I will start this off by saying haters gonna hate and now I will tell you how I feel about the whole experience and what it has also taught me.
This was an innocent picture and my son, who is so funny and makes us laugh daily with some of the things he comes out with, was playing with an old broken laptop. We gave it to him for imaginary play and that is exactly what he did with it. He did nothing different than a child whose parent is a doctor or a truck driver. He decided to play out what he sees. He watches me when I am working on my laptop writing posts, editing photos, when I am setting up photography shots of something I have cooked or baked and also getting pictures when we receive something from a brand that he plays with or even events that we do as a family.
My job is my blog. I have made it what it is from hard work and writing which I love. So he decided to pretend to be me and this was the photo and caption that I wrote to go with it.
This was innocent and funny and as you can see from some of the comments showing, other blogger friends totally understood and thought it was funny. However, this was a comment I received on the post from someone on Facebook:
Now I did answer her professionally but I was a little hurt by her comment mainly because it was my first really negative comment on something I have posted. However, what really made me angry was that this person doesn’t know me personally or at all. How would she know how I am with my kids or if I spend more time blogging than with them? I absolutely hate that people like this can make such awful remarks to another human being. I actually said that I spend more time with my children now than I ever did working full-time outside the home. I get to go to every school event, concert, sports game and everything in between. I work usually when my older kids are at school and after they go to bed and I am getting better about not working on weekends.
My blog isn’t just a place where I vent or write about things but I am now finally come to a place in my head where I am treating it as a business. I am trying to support my family financially as well as in every other aspect. I think that a really wonderful blogging friend of mine Aeryn from Geek with Style said it best and I am quoting her here now:
I’m not a parent blogger (dads can and do blog too,) though as someone who blogs professionally, I have had the immense pleasure of meeting many who blog in the parenting niche, and your thoughts couldn’t be farther from the truth. These people have their children first and foremost in their minds all day long. You can only really be successful in blogging, if you write about what you love, and parent bloggers love and interact with their children at a formidable level. What other job lets you bring your kids to work so often? That said, children of bloggers are largely given a valuable lesson in entrepreneurship, as they’re *with* their parents during events and staging (and evidently here, even during the actual writing). Many already have a steady hand in photography (staging, lighting techniques, etc,) as they watch and eventually practice with their parents smartphones. So rest assured this morning that there aren’t neglected children out there while mommys and daddys play with the toys they’re given for their kids to review, nor having stroller races in the backstreets while their kids wait for supper.
I couldn’t have said it better myself. My blog has afforded me and my family a lot of things we couldn’t have otherwise had access to. It allows me to always be there when my kids need me most. My kids get a homecooked meal every night and at the same time, we spend time as a family enjoying that dinner without any distractions. I tuck my kids in every single night before they go to sleep and I wake them up every morning for school. I pack their lunches every morning, do my daughter’s hair for her and still manage to get my toddler to potty train, the baby breastfed and my house cleaned. I spend 4-7 hours a day on my blog but the flexibility to work those hours at any time in a day are mine. I am my own boss and there is not a thing in this world I would change and I am sure if you asked any of my kids, they will tell you that I don’t ignore them, that they are happy and loved. My blog has allowed my kids to do things that I wasn’t able to do as a kid and for that I am grateful.
So for the person who, after commenting and then receiving many responses from my wonderful circle of blogger moms, deleted her comment, you know nothing about my every day and nothing about me as a mom. You weren’t here when I finished painting my sons’ new room at 2 a.m. and then finally fell asleep at 3 to get up again at 7 to get them off to school, or when my littlest one was up every hour the other night because he is teething and still got up to work and take care of my kids. Before you decide to judge something you know nothing about, ask yourself if it’s kind and if it isn’t, don’t say it.